06.11.04
Reasons to hate football
1) It’s played by professional footballers
If that’s not enough for you:
2) Euro 2004 is about to kick off, and that means one of two things if you happen to be be English (or to be fair, Dutch, Portuguese or Spanish): either your team will nosedive gracelessly out in the first round or, worse, they will deliver one excellent result, then be squeaked out by the French or the Germans in the knockout phase.
3) The Football League has renamed itself The Championship. This now means that the English Championship will be won by team officially 21st placed in the land, i.e. the winners of the old Division One, which is in turn the old Division Two. Likewise, teams who are playing in what was up until 1990 Division Three will now be playing in Division One, and those hovering near the exit of the league structure altogether will be only in Division Two. Got that? Another way of putting it is that in the late eighties the title of winners of Division One was being contested by Arsenal, Everton and Liverpool. Next season it will be contested by the likes of Bournemouth, Luton and Wrexham.
Contrast the drab money-accumulation of modern football with the renewed glory of English cricket: for the second series in succession they’ve won the rubber before going into the final test and, more gloriously, for the first time in living memory the best fast bowler in the world is an Englishman.
Peter said,
June 12, 2004 at 2:15 pm
Ah but Jonathan, if one is a Scot, what blissful prospects for the exercise of *schadenfreude* unroll before one. And, after all, along with shinty and shooting onself in the foot, *schadenfreude* is the Scottish national sport.
James Rey said,
August 4, 2004 at 6:11 pm
All this is true and money, advertising etc is spoiling football as times goes on but we must remember that it is still a much more creative, skillful sport than the likes of Rugby or American football. It is still the beautiful game.
sir nivek said,
October 12, 2004 at 1:17 pm
football is taken to seriously ppl get stabed over football and it causes riots, and all there doing is watching over paid men in shorts run around with a f***ing ball. its a waist of life when you can be out enjoying yourself football fans choose to stay in and watch footy, even choose football over women. FOOTBALL SCUM!!!