Past Time

I have just turned forty-six. On the webnews this evening, Ms Catherine Deneuve was saying that from a Hollywood perspective, life was over at 45. Well, nobody who has seen me in the plentiful flesh would describe me as a professional beauty, but I do find that a little sad. At 46, I find that quite a lot of people I have known for 25 years or so seem now to be ruling significant portions of the world. I am infinitely less at the mercy of employers than I was when I was 26, slim, and really quite pretty, both because I have a track record of miscellaneous virtue, and because I now know what to do if someone gets opportunistic. I have friends, literally, in every continent. I haven’t apologised for anything for at least a decade. While it might be nice to look like Ms Catherine Deneuve (or near offer, given that I never had either cheekbones or a nose, thought at least I had nice legs), it would take me, as it takes her, four or five hours a day, which to my mind, would be better spent reading, writing, or gardening. And what would it get me? really, not a lot: it would be much harder to get onto genuinely friendly terms with people such as the Apparitional Gamekeeper, and indeed, quite a lot of the chaps who work for us on and off, if I was visibly keeping open options on being ‘attractive to men’. There would, I suppose, be the opportunity to spend a lot of money on clothes, if I were still size 10. Well. Whoop de doo. And if you’ve stopped being interested….? The only thing in the course of the last week which has really given me a poignant moment of passing time is that it now takes me six goes to thread a needle. Tayla and I are making a patchwork and I keep passing the thread over, ‘could you just do this…?’ So: partially sighted, stout, unapologetic, unrepentant, I say, youth was all very well and was fun while it lasted, but with respect to everything which I actually care about, middle age is better.

4 Responses to “Past Time”

  1. Andreas Minor Says:

    From a fellow Aquarian, and an unnecessarily young one at that, many happy returns. I personally am very much looking forward to the pleasure of an accumulation both of years and experience, while still having the verve and luxury of putting them to good use (to wit, further experience and pleasure). Despite the very recent addition of a single year to my total, I remain in the early accumulating period. Everything up for grabs, nothing in the bag, as a game show host might put it.

  2. the tropical godparents Says:

    What you say, it is ALL SO TRUE! I speak as one who knows. But you must on no account miss out on a MID LIFE CRISIS, which can be protracted for decades as nearly everybody’s darling mamma has so successfully demonstrated.

  3. Janey Says:

    Yes, indeed — but being of strong constitution & invincible optimism, I am proposing to have my mid life crisis when I am fifty-five. So you all have time to dig bunkers, buy becoming flak jackets, etc.

  4. The Canadian Professor Says:

    I shall shortly put into the post the perfect solution to the matter of needle threading.

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