Well, after a lot of righteous men becoming selfrighteous to an extent which was just a bit tiring, we seem to have some kind of an answer. Keith the Quondam Plumber (now working offshore), rung up by Current Plumber, who knows him, with the essential ‘faur’s the pipe?’ said that he hadn’t plumbed us to a tank. Other sources, such as the farmer, said there was a tank. A great deal of ill humour ensued, what with peoples’ words being doubted and all. The Farmer has dug up the tank, and we now have some, but not an exhaustive, idea of what is what. Keith the Q P simply followed the Victorian lead piping wheresoe’er it led him, till it got to something like a system. What we think it may have lead him to is some obsolete work of the Turriff Water Co. in the late nineteenth century. For some utterly inexplicable reason this joined upwards of a beautiful Victorian system of filtering and settling tanks, which Keith, consequently, never knew existed, though the whole thing doesn’t make sense. But we have had about four years of water since the last crisis, off a different system apparently forgotten by mortal man. I don’t enjoy water crises but you have to say that it is no bad thing to understand the value of water, or even to know where it comes from. Perhaps after ten years of having baths, we soon will.